Downton Abbey is still the best TV portrayal of sisters
When it comes to female siblings, few shows portray this uniquely beautiful family dynamic.
As one of three sisters raised in a raucous household, Downton Abbey has always been a popular show in my family.
When the ITV period drama first came out in 2010, it soon became staple viewing, with my siblings and I each relating to the Crawley sisters – Mary, Edith and Sybil – in our own way.
From headstrong attitudes that pushed their father into the new century to interpersonal dynamics that flitted between furious to unwavering devotion, we saw ourselves in the characters.
And as we mark 15 years since the show went on air, I truly believe the Crawley sisters made it what it is today: one of the most beloved period dramas around, even all these years on.
My siblings and I watched the trio navigate the highs and lows of early 20th century life, including youngest sister Sybil’s fight to marry the family chauffeur, Branson, and Edith and Mary’s conflicts about Mary’s eldest child arrogance and Edith’s marriage prospects, that seemed to ebb and flow violently.
And their storylines sparked debates on our own sofa about whether the sisters had made the right calls when it came to their various scandals (think the Turkish diplomat dying in Mary’s bed or Edith keeping her biological child a secret), as my father defended the patriarch Lord Grantham’s exasperated decisions.
Edith (right) and Mary’s conflicts seemed to ebb and flow (Picture: ITV / Nick Briggs)And as I’ve grown up, I’ve found myself constantly veering back to Downton Abbey as the portrayal of sisterhood stands out as one of my favourites on TV.
The experience of being part of the white landed gentry in the early 1900s is a far cry from being a young Pakistani Muslim woman in the 21st century, but every time I switch on the show, it feels comforting to see that some things are universal.
When I was younger and found my understanding of the world clashing with my parents’, it was characters like Sybil who offered a picture of the power of resistance to the status quo and how powerful it can be to put yourself first.
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Previous Page Next PageYet when it comes to sisterhood specifically, few shows portray this uniquely beautiful family dynamic, and its resilience in the face of untold challenges, with such candour.
We see the sisters figuring out how to navigate Sybil running away with Branson without breaking the family, and Edith and Mary resolute in staying in one another’s life despite their regular spats. Time is given to flesh out this blood connection in a way not often seen on screens.
Characters like Sybil offered a picture of how powerful it can be to put yourself first (Picture: ITV / Nick Briggs)Normally, sister relationships in media have very little nuance to emphasise how important (and fraught) these bonds can be, especially when they are not the central relationship of the show.
In Downton, the romances, servants’ troubles and family crises as a whole are the driving force of the plot, but space is still given to explore the complexities of sisterhood.
Downton Abbey-lovers will know that there are few episodes more gutting than the fifth episode in series three in which Sybil dies after complications from childbirth.
Comment nowAre you a big Downton Abbey fan? Have your say in the comments belowComment NowThere is a scene after her death when the three sisters are together for one final time that – without fail – moves me deeply every time.
When Mary says, ‘She was the only person living who always thought you and I were such nice people’, I choke up. In this moment, all the arguments, the hardships, the personality clashes and the past grudges are washed away. It’s such a simple yet beautiful way of highlighting the love between the three of them.
Time is given to flesh out this blood connection in a way not often seen on screens (Picture: Joss Barratt/Carnival Films)In my experience, sisters are the first to forgive and someone you grow to appreciate more and more as the years go by, even if you were at each other’s throats as a child. It’s definitely something I relate to as I see my sisters more as friends than household foes.
In later seasons, we see things become more tense between the surviving two, especially when Mary betrays her sister by revealing to Edith’s fiancé that Edith’s adopted daughter, Marigold, is actually her biological daughter – a fact Edith had yet to tell him.
It’s an unforgivable move, and yet, after some time apart, Edith returns home and explains to Mary why she’s decided to move on. ‘In the end, you’re my sister,’ she tells her.
The tenderness of sisterhood, in all its glorious messiness, feels like a steady presence throughout Downton Abbey (Picture: ITV / Nick Briggs)It’s a scene that has stayed with me long after the credits rolled and, whenever I find myself arguing with my sisters, I recall it to remind myself of what’s important – and why our bond is bigger than any fights we may have.
I’m grateful that my own relationship with my sisters doesn’t reach quite the same levels of dysfunction as the Crawleys but within their dynamic, these hidden gems of wisdom are something I’ve collected over the years.
No matter the various romances, tragedies, and soap opera-style storylines going on in the rest of Downton Abbey, the tenderness of sisterhood, in all its glorious messiness, feels like a steady presence throughout, a thread running along its spine.
Nowadays, I’m a sucker for sister-based media, whether it’s Sharon Horgan’s crime comedy Bad Sisters or the BBC sitcom Such Brave Girls. But to me, anyway, it feels like Downton walked so they could run.
I will always be grateful to Downton Abbey for being one of my comfort shows, and the surprising ways in which it portrays sisterhood – in all its beauty and ugliness.
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